Awakening

What's your cup of tea?

This weekend I remembered how much I love music and how much I need it in my life sometimes. When you have a 3 year old and only a 5 minute commute to work you don't get a lot of time to listen to what you want to listen to. Harper is at the stage where she picks things up very easily so listening to any non-child appropriate music is out of the question and with my short commute I am lucky if there is a song on during that time. Music has a way of speaking to me and I love how the music I pick follows the mood I am in. I like to say that my iPod is ADD because I have pretty much every genre imaginable on there. I like so many kinds of music but I probably gravitate toward Christian and Country the most. This weekend, the Passion 2010 CD "Awakening" was my jam.

I attended Passion 2010 right after one of the hardest times in my life. I felt like I pretty much hit rock bottom. Like hard. I really didn't know what to do with my life or which direction my life would head but I was determined to allow God to do whatever He needed to heal me during that trip. I did a lot of healing that weekend and I was so surprised and so thankful how renewed I felt after that experience. I like to listen to this CD when I know my life is about to be rocked. These songs give me so much strength because it reminds me of a time where I overcame so much in my life and when God did so much work in my life. I knew I was going to have a similar experience this past weekend.

This past weekend I attended a business retreat with about 450 of my fellow business partners (Lemon Droppers). I knew that my world was going to be rocked and that it was going to change my life. I was so stoked and so scared. I was ready to grow and be rocked but I wasn't ready to face some things I needed to face. At some point I will go in more depth about what I learned and how it changed my life but for right now I will stick with an overall view. I learned so much about myself personally. This retreat was way more about personal growth than about business and it was much needed. I am ready to grow as a person and pursue my dreams.

After the Passion 2010 conference I was renewed, I was pumped, I was ready to be myself. I was ready to be happy and I was ready to do great things. I was renewed in my faith and love for Christ. I wanted to shout it from the roof tops. Just like with Passion 2010, this retreat has sparked something in me. I am gaining my self-confidence back. I am gaining a desire to pursue my dreams. I am gaining the drive to achieve my dreams. The first thing I am going to do is shout what I do from the roof tops.

I am a Lemon Dropper. Selling Young Living Essential Oils is my BUSINESS, not a hobby. I love Young Living Essential Oils and what they have done for me and my family. 

So yes, I did listen to "Awakening" on the way home. Yes, I did jam out to it super loud! Yes, I am renewed. Yes, I am ready to see what God has in store for me. Yes, I am an entrepreneur. 

Go listen to this CD. It is amazing. It has all my favs on it. Chris Tomlin, The David Crowder Band, Kristian Stanfill and Hillsong: United.

Guilty

This pregnancy is so different from my last pregnancy in so many ways. I am dropping everything under the sun...like what is wrong with me that I can't hold onto anything! I know I am clumsy but I have reached all new levels. This baby hardly ever moves compared to the very active Harper in womb. I often wonder if the baby is ok or even in there. I pee a little every time I bend over, sit down, cough or sneeze. BOO!!! We haven't really discussed baby names yet. Like if I had this baby tomorrow it might not have a name for like a week. I have also been surprisingly less stressed. I was a basket case with Harper but I seem to be a little more put together this time which is greatly appreciated. It is amazing how much you don't do months in advance when it is your second child/pregnancy. With Harper I wanted to make sure I had everything we needed. This time I know that I have everything because I don't think we have gotten rid of anything. The problem is getting out what I need beforehand so that I don't stress myself out when the baby finally arrives. So if anyone has any suggestions or reminders...throw them at me!! Remember, I work best at lists so let me know what I need done so I can add it to my list =)

In so many ways this pregnancy is the same. I still have pregnancy brain. I am still craving and eating everything under the sun. I have unfortunately gained more weight than I wanted. I am the most pregnant during the hottest months of the year. I have become miserable in my last month because I am so big. My belly is so low that none of my shirts are long enough and I refuse to wear size large t-shirts because they are so big on top. I am also just as nervous about labor and delivery. With a month left, I am also ready to "get it over with" so to speak. I am anxious for my little bundle of joy and to begin the process of learning a new routine with a family of four. Let's get this show on the road.

As we are nearing the end with about a month to go, I realize that there is still so much that I haven't done. I am going to be posting my to-do list so that I know what I still need to do and so I know where to reference my list. I will be checking off or adding to it as needed so stay tuned!


Check List

Pack my hospital bag
Pack babies hospital bag
Put up pack in play
Deep Clean Master Bedroom
Get down car seat and stroller
Clean car seat and stroller
Install car sear into car
Discuss possible baby names
Write Birth Plan
Finalize what essential oils I want to bring
Get down newborn - 0-3 months clothes
Wash gender neutral newborn - 0-3 months clothes
Find pack and play sheets
Wash pack and play sheets
Find bottles
Wash bottles
Find breast pump
Wash breast pump parts
Plan Harper's Birthday Party

Here is to the month of August flying by and our little Linnell 2.0 getting here before we know it!!

For the Love of God, Can We Just Get That Off the Ceiling!!!

Do you ever just stand in the shower and think "Will I ever just have it all together?" I probably have that thought about every couple of months or so. I seem to get in a grove and then all of a sudden I feel like I am back at square one. It is like I am on a roller coaster. The moments like that usually happen when my routine is broken up or things just keep going wrong right after one another (hence the broken ceramic bowl a couple weeks ago). I try not to get to what I call the boiling point. The point where I just can't handle it anymore and I explode. It isn't good and it usually ends up with me either breaking something or me yelling at my family =(

I have come to appreciate the "square one" or the beginning (for the most part). Fresh starts are so "refreshing" in a way. I like being able to start with a clean slate. Each time I end up starting new, I feel slightly better about myself. Weird, huh? I know! It would be nice if I could just keep it together and not get to my boiling point but that just isn't reality. Even when you are on a diet, diets have "cheat days" cuz who can keep it together all the time? Sometimes a "fresh" look at things can be a good thing. I've come up with new ideas or better ways to organize. It has even helped me to get rid of some things. It doesn't have to be bad.

When considering a "fresh" start, do yourself a favor.

1. Make small goals. When I say small, I mean tiny, manageable, no problem getting this goal done type of small goals. 20 minutes a day in a problem area is such a great, small goal. 20 minutes, that is all it takes. Even if you skip a day or two, it is in the forethought of your mind and if you try to stick with it, it will eventually stick.

2. Make lists. Make tons and tons of lists. I have lists everywhere. I mean everywhere. In my phone, in a million notebooks, on a million sheets of paper. I have also put dry erase boards on the wall of every room. For me, if it is not written down, I forget it. End of Story. Do not pass Go and collect $200 because I am not remembering what I wanted to do. Don't worry if you don't cross everything off the list right away or even at all. I have a journal that has about 3 pages worth of a list. Sometimes I cross something off of it, sometimes I don't. Don't harp over the list. Just have a list or two or a hundred. Who cares, just have one. It will serve as a reminder and eventually you will learn how to prioritize and fulfill the things on the lists. But you have to start somewhere.

3. Start somewhere. Anywhere. Don't let yourself sit in a rut of unhappiness or frustration. Don't do it. I know its hard. I have been there several times. Just don't do it. Ask for help, research, read blogs. Do something to help you get started. I am afraid to fail but that doesn't mean I won't try something. I even get upset when I fail but you have to start somewhere and you can't let the failures keep you from trying. I hate the saying "don't be afraid to fail" because being afraid and not doing something are two different things. I am afraid most of the time but I don't let that fear tell me what to do.

4. Take things slow. Realize that you are human and have your limits. Do not push yourself too hard or too fast. You most likely will not be successful and that will just cause you to be more frustrated. Plan, pray about it, write it down, discuss it with someone, or whatever it is that you need to do to make sure that you are taking it slow and making manageable goals. A friend posted a blog post that I found interesting. It was a post about 33 things that the author did everyday. Before I starting reading it, I was like "33 things, that seems easy". I then started reading it and immediately became overwhelmed. The amount (or maybe the extent) of tasks she did just made me feel instantly stressed. As I thought about it, I realized that I probably do more than 33 tasks in one day but to have them all written down like that made it seem so overwhelming. One day I might decide to count how many tasks I do. I am curious to know the number because if it is more than 33 (like I think) then I will know that I am capable of doing 33 tasks in one day. I think I might even start with doing one task per day and start adding tasks as I feel I can achieve them. See...taking things slow.

http://moneysavingmom.com/2015/06/33-things-i-do-almost-every-day-that-make-my-day-so-much-better.html

5. Don't for one minute think that I have it all put together. Come to my house and I will show you how "put together" I am...lol. I haven't been as successful with the 30 day cleaning challenge (at least following what room I had assigned for that day) as I have been with my 30 day oil challenge but I have gotten more cleaned in my house. Most days I have actually probably cleaned more than 20 minutes. I don't call that a failure. I call that progress because I am being intentional with my time and my goals. They just aren't following the exact format I have set in place but something is getting done!

I hope that no one gets to the their boiling point. It is no fun. I hope that I can provide some motivation and encouragement. This is something that I have struggled with what is probably my whole life. I will probably continue to struggle with it but I hope that I am starting to create good, productive habits that will turn into normal, functioning life. Now to go yell at my husband to "For the love of God get whatever that is off the ceiling."

So many shows...so little time

One of what I feel like is only a few things that Eric and I have in common is our love for TV and movies. We might not have the same exact taste when it comes to TV and movies but for the most part we are pretty eye to eye. It is one of the reason why I fell in love with him and I love that we can share this passion together.

This summer we are taking the opportunity to catch on shows we wanted to watch but either got interested in them a few seasons in or didn't have time to watch them during the year. I wanted to watch the CW's Flash when it premiered in the Fall but it had connections to CW's Arrow that I didn't know about. Arrow is one that I was interested in but was currently boycotting because they used a different actor than the one that was in several seasons of the CW's Smallville. I was not a happy camper when I learned that Justin Hartley was not going to be the actor in the "spin-off". I am still bitter about it, in fact. In fact, I think I am refusing to believe that I am actually watching "Arrow" because that is in fact not "Arrow". It is also a "tension" point between Eric and I. He loves the new Arrow better and is glad the old Arrow got replaced (Insert eye roll).

I mean, come on...who can replace him

I think I would have originally liked the new actor that plays Arrow if they didn't have the character on Smallville. You can't change things on me. It's just not cool.

In addition to catching up on the CW's Arrow, I want to catch up on the CW's Flash. We are also hoping to finish the Seinfield series (another one that Eric loves and I just roll my eyes). Independently, I would like to watch the whole series of CBS's Survivor and the Amazing Race (now that is a big feat!!). I also wouldn't mind catching up on CBS's NCIS LA. My question is...do you have any suggestions on shows we should watch while we have the time?? I know there are so many out there and I want to know which ones we are missing out on!

Did Someone Say it is July? Say What? No Way!

July

July is an awesome month. Why you ask? Well it is my birthday month so naturally it would be awesome! I am shocked by how fast the year has gone. I can't believe that the year is half over. It is unbelievable. I am a person that is motivated by lists. Everything has to be written down because I either forget about it or don't feel like doing it. If my whole life could be a checklist, that would be wonderful. I know that is not possible and that it puts way too much pressure on myself but at least I would know what I was supposed to being doing when I am supposed to be doing it. It would be a nice guideline to life at least. I am going to try to be a little more organized and what better time to be positive and get my act in gear than July, my birthday month. So here I go!

2 Challenges

During the month of July, I have challenged myself with two challenges. Usually when I think of challenges it is in the middle of the month and then by the time the beginning of the next month roles around I forget all about it (insert failed ab, squat, pushup, cleaning challenge, etc...). I am excited that I came up with both of these challenges at the beginning of the month and hopefully I can see them through!

Challenge #1

The first challenge is to spend 20 minutes a day on an area of the house in hopes to eventually get it all put together. I actually started this challenge earlier than the 1st and have been very pleased with the results. Depending on how I am doing on my regular cleaning of the house, I might have to alter the task for each day but I am very hopeful that this will help me get things together. I am sick of the house just being so unorganized and cluttered. Here is to creating a good habit and feeling better about myself and also not going crazy living in my house. 

Challenge #2

The second challenge is to make a post everyday on Facebook about how I am using the Essential Oils that are in Young Living's Premium Starter Kit. I have been using Young Living Essential Oils since March and have been completely obsessed with them and what all I can use them for. The Premium Starter Kit is a great value and it does a really good job at showcasing the versatility of the oils that Young Living offers. I love these oils and I am excited to share my love with anyone that will listen to me. Make sure to check my Facebook page for a daily post to see what I am crazy about that day.

Happy July to everyone! It is my favorite month (for obvious reasons)! I hope everyone can enjoy it!

Wow...talk about procrastination!

Long Time, No See

It has been a year and a half since my last post. I was in a really bad place...mentally, spiritually, emotionally, etc... I felt like all I was doing was complaining which wasn't good for anyone. I still have things I wish were better and days that I can't handle but at least I feel like I am in a better place. At least most of the time.

A little update

Since my last blog, I have found a full-time job, I am expecting our second child, Harper is almost 3 and Eric and I have been married for almost 4 1/2 years. While it is nice to be more financially stable, I am absolutely exhausted. Eric works evenings so I have Harper by myself during the times when we are both fatigued. It is not a lovely combo plus add the lovely pregnancy fatigue. I am also feeling like I don't get quality time with Harper. I am trying to be patient and content. This is just a season of life until Eric can get through school and a new opportunity is presented to us.

I am due at the beginning of September and it couldn't come fast enough. I am carrying this baby so low that it is so uncomfortable. I can't sit, I can't stand and I can't sleep. Before anyone asks...we aren't finding out the gender of the baby.

Moving Forward

I am hoping to get back into the blogging spirit so bare with me. I promise to try to not be whiny. I promise to try to be uplifting. I promise to try and share more. I promise to try to be a doer and not a wisher.